Category Archives: Written by Joannie Tansky

Quel Surprise! It’s December and it Snowed!

So, who’s going to win? Roy Moore the republican with some nasty ‘sexual misconduct’ charges hovering around him or Doug Jones, the staunch Democrat? Lest any poll think themselves geniuses and are predicting the answer, we will remind you of the polls just before the presidential election, which had Hillary beating Trump by 95%.

In this election the outcome could depend on who doesn’t vote. Voter turnout is supposed to be low as Alabama usually votes Republican but many people will most likely stay home rather than vote for Moore. We may send out a special Blanche report tonight once the results are in.

A final note about Roy Moore. He was accused of being, shall we say, not a lover of the Jewish people. Well, today his wife tried to put that at rest. Here are her remarks. Try to read them with a southern drawl, they’ll sound even better:

Fake news would tell you that we don’t care for Jews. And I tell you all this because I’ve seen it and I just want to set the record straight while they’re here. One of our attorneys is a Jew. We have very close friends that are Jewish, and rabbis, and we also fellowship with them. Seriously? Some of my best friends are Jewish? No comment.

Quel surprise! Winter came in December. Seems the public works people in Montreal just can’t seem to get their act together when it comes to our annual first snowstorm. Salt? Plows? Fuggedaboutit. They finally made an appearance this afternoon but not before busses and cars went slip slidden away down hills this morning.

Can someone please send our new mayor Plante a memo that we always get our first snowfall in December? Maybe next year the surprise factor will be eliminated.

Good thing that genius Bangladeshi dude couldn’t figure out how to make a bomb properly. It exploded prematurely and injured a few people mildly. The terrorist got the brunt of the explosion.

There is absolutely no way to stop such people as there are just too many soft targets everywhere.

Well, there is a way. Don’t let them into the country in the first place. He came in on a chain migration law, which is when US immigrants legally bring family members into the country. People like him are going to ruin it for decent people trying to bring their family members to the US. Let’s bet Trump puts an end to this loophole.

Uber best sit up and take note of this next piece. Go-Jek is a $3 billion Indonesian start-up. When you download their app you summon a car or motorbike driver who could  give you a lift,  bring you takeout, shop for groceries or deliver a present to someone across town. Wait it gets better.

They have another app called Go-Life. With that  you can hail someone to come cut your hair, give you a massage, clean your bathroom or change your car’s oil. And with the money you keep in Go-Jek’s digital wallet, you can pay your electricity bill, buy mobile data and book movie tickets — all within the app.

The company was built by one person and is now worth about $3billion. Blanche, ya think we should grab a ride on a motorbike? What if it starts to rain  or even worse, a huge wind appears and we get blown around? We’ll stick to cars.

What’s with democratic senator  Kirsten Gillibrand? First thing you should know is that she replaced Hillary when she decided to run for president.

Miss-holier-than-thou seems to have had a revelation at her bible class this week. To get Trump to resign due to sexual harassment charges. What was last week’s revelation? To get Al Franken to resign and in fact she was successful.

Given that, she shouldn’t be taking herself so seriously. There’s a vast difference between a senator and the president, who, by the way, ain’t going anywhere. For some reason she reminds us of Pocahontas – Elizabeth Warren – and not in a good way. We need the big barf bag for both of them.

We would like to take this opportunity to bid our dear friend Tommy Schnurmacher a fond farewell as he retires from his over forty years in the radio and entertainment business in Montreal. His wit, intelligence, quick-thinking and humour will be sorely missed on Montreal’s airwaves.

As we have heard more times than we can count, the last man standing at Montreal’s main English radio station is Aaron Rand. Once he bites the dust we will be left with the pathetic choice of either a flat-line, white-bread boring host trying to fill Tommy’s shoes or a giggling childish woman appealing to someone with the intelligence of a five-year-old.

Happy Chanukah
We’ll Talk…

Roaring California Wildfires

Blanche, did you see the fires happening near in Beverly Hills and Belair? No one is immune. Fire doesn’t distinguish between rich and poor.  One very wealthy resident loaded up her Bentley as she prepared to flee the neighborhood – where homes cost an average of $3.3million

When authorities tell people to leave, it means now. You may have a few minutes to gather some important items and then run for your life.

The largest blaze, the Thomas Fire, is now four times the size of Manhattan. Southern California issued a ‘purple wind’ warning today – an extreme on the color-coded system that has never been used before. It showed the expected strength of the winds driving the  fierce wildfires has reached uncharted territory, pushing past red, which means ‘high’ into the color that means ‘extreme.’

And a final chilling forecast given today: The National Weather Service San Diego now says that much of the region – including LA, Ventura, Orange County, Inland Empire, San Diego and Santa Barbara – are at ‘Extreme’ risk of fires. That means that ‘upon ignition fires will have extreme growth, will burn very intensely, and will be uncontrollable. G-d protect everyone and watch over the firefighters.

When major news networks point their cameras to East Jerusalem, they are goading and waiting for ‘riots’ to erupt. Nothing new there.

So who’s the most angry with Trump’s announcement. Let’s start with the UN, the place of peace that puts the most oppressive Muslim countries on a panel discussing women’s rights.

Then there’s Turkey, Bolivia, Egypt, France, Italy, Senegal, Sweden, United Kingdom and Uruguay. Wait, the Pope also isn’t happy.

All those listed (and the list is much longer) are certainly not models of making Jews feel welcome. The UN security council is expected to meet on Friday to ‘discuss’ Trump’s recognition of Jerusalem as Israel’s capital. What’s the point of meeting, they already have the answer.

It behooves us to remember, in the end, who runs the world and it’s not Trump or Trudeau or any other world leader. G-d runs the world, which is why the words emblazoned on the UN are even more appropriate today: For out of Zion shall go forth the law, and the word of the Lord from Jerusalem. Nation will not take up sword against nation, nor will they train for war anymore.

Blanche called out (via emailing his office) our Quebec member of parliament, David Birnbaum, on his total lack of any backbone in voting for that asinine motion of getting rid of Bonjour Hi when greeting people. 

The response from his office? Seems so many people sent him angry emails that he’s holding a breakfast next week to ‘discuss’ the situation. We were invited to said breakfast. Our response to his office:

With all due respect, there’s nothing to discuss. The deed is done. You can remind Mr. Birnbaum of the following: People who vote are done with politicians like him – yes-men who cannot or will not take a stand on anything. They vote the ‘party-line’ like robots. Results of his kind of politician are seen in elections that brought in Brexit, Trump and Macron.

We wonder if the PQ or Liberals noticed that when paying by credit card, the machines all have Welcome Bonjour. Are they going to go after that next? See how ridiculous this sounds? Mr. Birnbaum can serve the best breakfast in the world. He cannot undo the damage that was done and the fools that the Liberal party made of themselves.

Today in Quebec’s parliament, Couillard had no choice but to address this issue as the international media got hold of it and made him and all of Quebec look like clowns. We have said this on more than one occasion: International companies take note of all this nitpicking by the PQ and think fifty times before even thinking about moving here.

Anyone hear of Kent Hehr? He’s the Liberal’s Disablity Minister who himself is a paraplegic. One would think that someone with his own issues would be a bit empathetic to others with issues. Think again.

He met with a group of thalidomide (an anti-nauseau drug given in the 50’s to pregnant women which causes severe birth defects to their children) survivors. Why they met with him is irrelevant. Hehr’s treatment of them was nothing short of abhorrent

On hearing of their suffering he responded, “Well, you don’t have it so bad. Everyone has a sob story.” When told of their shortened life expectancy…”So you probably have about ten years left. That’s good news for the Canadian government.”

Instead of issuing a normal apology and letting the whole thing die, Hehr tried to say that his remarks were misconstrued. It appears that Trudeau is having a hard time keeping up with the damage control in his party.

And this dude? He needs to be put of his misery, fired and then sent to therapy. Oh wait. We would probably have to pay for that. Forget it. Just keep him behind a desk pushing papers.

That clown Al Franken resigned today, in defiance and without issuing an apology. Good riddance.

Kudos to Time magazine for making the silence breakers person of the year. The pendulum will eventually swing back to the middle, but not until all the dirt has risen to the surface.

We left this little ditty for the end. If you use airbnb, take note: hidden cameras have been found in homes that were rented out. They are very difficult to detect. You will not find them with a quick scan of the apartment or house.

One way to deal with the situation is unplug the internet. You won’t have wifi, but your ‘hosts’ won’t be able to watch you take a shower or doing things that are none of their business.

Good Shabbos
We’ll talk…

Bonjour. Hi.

Bonjour – Hi. We think that those two letters, Hi, should be emblazoned on billboards all over Montreal. While his party is in the toilet, Lisee seems to be able to keep that word – separation – alive. He’s insidious and sneaky.

Couple his remarks with the fact in today’s paper that 7,000 people left Montreal last year and you have a recipe for big companies thinking ten times about coming here, as they have since 1976.

And it’s not just Anglos who are leaving. So are francophones. Couillard was an idiot to agree with Lisee’s motion. He should have had the kahoonas to say it was ridiculous and made us the laughing stock of North America, which it did. The NY Times ran a story about it.

The provincial government in Quebec are infuriating and just plain dumb. Wait Blanche, we have another idea: Someone should create toilet paper with the word hi written all over it and give it to Lisee and Couillard. Maybe then they will get the point.

Justin Trudeau is definitely not having a good time in China. In fact, he’s most likely changing his shirt a few times a day due to heavy sweating. Seems he cannot launch a deal on free trade negotiations.

As we have said on more than one occasion, the bad combination of being in a job where’s he’s over his head coupled with air between his ears doesn’t bode well for him.

Yesterday, the meeting with the Chinese delegation ended in stalemate after the two sides could not agree on language about the inclusion of labour protections in the framework for talks.

Perhaps Trudeau’s handlers prepped him and he forgot what they told him. Or perhaps they thought he could smile his way through China while taking selfies and wearing fancy socks. Neither worked.

There are three rules when trying to do business with the Chinese: never try to impose your own values; never interpret acknowledgment during a meeting as agreement; don’t assume the people in that meeting have the authority to strike a deal. We are thinking that this was way too much information for Trudeau to absorb.

Blanche, ya think they need to put a net under the new Champlain Bridge to catch cars that might fall through?

You know, the one where over 2000 new parts came in defective? How defective you ask? Here’s the list they shared: porous steel plates; incomplete or non-existent soldering; defective bolts; and several holes poorly aligned in parts that have to be bolted together. One can only imagine the list they didn’t share.

And the cost? Here’s something to ponder. In NY, they are rebuilding the Tappan Zee bridge. It’s about 3 miles long and will cost $4 billion US. The Champlain Bridge is 2 miles long and so far the cost is $4.2 billion CAD. Got that?

Now that the balloon has been flown that over 2000 parts were defective and needed repair and because of that workers need to do overtime to fix said part, you can bet your bippy that $4.2 billion will be at least $5 billion by the time they are done.

The parts are being built in Trois-Rivières, Quebec City, Terrebonne and Madrid, Spain. They don’t say which plants the issues are coming from. And one more question: Spain? They couldn’t find anywhere further away to get parts? Quebec sais faire yet again. Bonjour, hi.

Blanche, for this one you need the mega barf bag. Colin Kaepernick might not have a future ahead of him in football. Ah, but he must be some kind of genius with much to offer aside from teaching students how not to stand for the national anthem. He will be paid six figures to give ‘lectures’ on college campuses and serve as the master of ceremonies at self-congratulatory leftist awards events.

On top of winning GQ’s “Citizen of the Year Award” and Sports Illustrated’s “Muhammad Ali Legacy Award,” Kaepernick has been awarded the “courageous advocate” award at the ACLU of Southern California’s annual Bill of Rights Dinner at the Beverly Wilshire.

Kaepernick is now a model for young people to emulate? There are no words.

Hot off the press: Russia has been banned from the winter olympics in 2018. Quel surprise. It took the IOC about 50 years to figure out that women from Russia, who looked like men, were on steroids or other enhancing drugs. Next.

According to Sheryl Sandberg, the COO of Facebook, there could be a very serious backlash regarding all those harassment charges. Men in positions of power may be very, very, very, reluctant to hire women.

This is a good news bad news story: The good news is that women won’t be harassed. The bad news is that they won’t be promoted or even hired.

Somewhere there will be some kind of equilibrium and yes, the men who were outed deserve what they are getting.

One of the cases that directly relate to this is happening now in Ottawa. During a photo shoot, a male MP was standing between two women and flippantly said this is not my idea of a threesome. He did not think before he spoke and his words were piggish.

He apologized three times but it appears that the woman involved was not happy with three apologies. He offered to go into mediation to render an apology. Not enough.

The woman in question here is traveling on the backs of the other women who came forward with serious charges. He apologized, realized he was wrong and she should have let it go. She could not and stood up in parliament yesterday and said the following:

“These comments have caused me great stress and have negatively affected my work environment.” Dearie, you need to get some help. You are obviously very delicate in nature. The dude apologized publicly and privately. You can’t take blood from a stone and he’s not resigning if that’s your objective.

We’ll talk…

Our Prime Minister The Drama Queen

We are not sure which is more infuriating – Trudeau crying on his apology tour or the men penning self-serving apologies for making the lives of the women they worked with hell.

Let’s start with Trudeau. He had to cry when he was giving his apology to the LGBTQ2 community? (You can look up that acronym yourself). He can’t just read the words on the page? He’s so tender and emotional that he can’t get through the text?  Spare us. He’s a drama-queen.

Here’s a headline for Trudeau: Had you read that apology like a normal person, without the dramatics, it would have had a much bigger impact. A Prime Minister should be empathic, strong, warm and in control. He is none of those. He’s sounds fake, has air between his ears and is totally out of his league.

As for the men penning apologies that are read in the media, save it. How about this: I was a disgusting human being. I’m getting help. Sorry doesn’t cut it.

The other people who need to get their dues are those who knew this was going on, like HR departments, and allowed it to continue. They are equally disgusting.

And one more little ditty on this: If you notice, most of those caught so far have been those self-righteous, tree-hugging liberals. Many are from Hollywood.  The politicians, except for Roy Moore in Alabama are Democrats. NPR, the ultra-save-the-whale station’s headline dude, Garrison Keillor was also accused of not being able to either keep his hands to himself, or keep his pants on. Blanche, did you see him? This is seriously gross. Feh. Feh. Feh.

It’s official. Anyone sitting in the Quebec National assembly running our province has the brain of gnat.

The PQ, specifically Lisee, said greeting customers with Bonjour – Hi is an irritant to the French language. Get out the guillotine and hang those salespeople. Zut Alors! French will disappear with Hi.

Hold on a minute. Isn’t Canada a bilingual country? And don’t we want tourists to come to our city and spend their money? Bonjour Hi is going to make a difference in someone’s life?

Here’s a headline for the PQ and Couillard who agreed with them: You best cut all social media and pull the plug on every channel that shows English movies because the younger generations in la belle province are watching American movies and, perish the thought, learning English. Gnats have too big a brain for these people. We are lowering their capabilities to that of a tsetse fly.

McGill University obviously doesn’t need any money. Today, More than 100 McGill University professors signed an open letter denouncing Quebec’s religious neutrality law, Bill 62.

We will remind you that said law requires women wearing a niqab to remove it when giving or receiving public services. You want to vote and are presenting a photo id? Remove your niqab and show your face or don’t vote.

McGill University, who can’t seem to get a handle on their student society who supports the BDS movement and other anti-semitic organizations, best lose the addresses of their big Jewish donors and start sending out their donation letters to the muslim community. They will be sure to send their big checks, eh Blanche?

We are entering the holiday travel period and if you have a ticket on American Airlines, pay attention to this. Yesterday they said a glitch in their computer system that pilots use to schedule time off raised concerns this week that many planes would lack pilots and other essential personnel. Oops.

Today, the company said that only a few hundred of its late December flights remain without pilots scheduled to fly the plane. Feel better? Didn’t think so.

Here’s the issue: The Allied Pilots Association had said that more than 15,000 American Airlines flights lacked a captain, co-pilot or both when a problem was discovered in the company’s scheduling system. Pilots were allowed to take vacation days in the last two weeks of December even if there wasn’t another pilot available to operate the flight.

Time will very quickly tell if they solved this issue. We wish you the best of luck on your American Airlines flight.

One of the better news shows is Morning Joe, hosted by Joe Scarborough and Mica Brezinski. For the most part they are intelligent, fair and balanced (kind of like Fox News). Until today when they added a muslim woman to their early morning panel.

It’s not that she was muslim that was bothersome. It’s that she acted holier-than-thou and Mica treated her like she was pair of soft kid gloves. She sat there like a deer in the headlights and belongs either on NPR or PBS. She has that haircut – very short, that semi-arabic accent and sounds like she’s talking out of a shoebox. Plus she said she was a muslim about ten times.

Good Shabbos
We’ll talk…

Mazel Tov to Harry and Meghan on their Engagement

In case you were wondering what to worry about today, here’s something: North Korea launched a missile in the middle night with a huge range – like they now have the capability to hit anywhere in the world. South Korea fired one back. The missile landed traveled about 1,000 kilometers before splashing down in the Sea of Japan, within Japan’s Economic Exclusion Zone. If that doesn’t sound good, it’s not.

Just saying in case your day was boring.

Another little tidbit that may aggravate your day is the new hijab Barbie doll. This was launched by Mattel, thinking that it is empowering arab women. In fact, it is doing the exact opposite.

Rather than reminding girls of a world of opportunities, the hijab reminds them of all the things they cannot do in many Muslim countries. These include decisions about their own lives and bodies. Let’s just say bleeding heart liberals have their own agenda and don’t give a hoot how it affects others, whom they consider ‘downtrodden’. Liberalism truly is an illness.

The NFL was once considered the most popular sports league in North America. How the mighty fall.

Support for this organization has steadily dwindled ever since Colin Kaepernick first knelt during the national anthem last season. Because the NFL is unable to make a decision on what to do about the kneel, the fans have made the decision for them.

They are staying away from the games in droves and not watching them on TV. Thanks to Twitter, fans took pictures of the stadiums over the Thanksgiving weekend. Pictures don’t lie and the stadiums were not full to say the least. We are guessing that Kaepernick isn’t going to be signed by a team any time soon. He’s just too much trouble.

As Royal watchers, we were very happy to see Prince Harry finally announce his engagement to Meghan Markle. Somehow, the death of his mother Diana when he was only eleven years old has always sat with us. We vividly recall him walking behind her casket, stone faced.

As well, his father is not the most empathic person to put it mildly and one wonders how many years he kept his emotions in check. There’s no doubt the did that because for a few years in his early twenties his behaviour was seriously out of control. He seems to have found himself and a wife.

We also could not help but remember that his uncle, King George abdicated the throne to marry the twice-divorced Wallis Simpson. Yes, the circumstances were different as his uncle was already King and Simpson was a rather unsavoury character. Markle was married before and will convert to Harry’s religion before the wedding. We can only hope that they will live, like a prince and princess, happily ever after.

Last Friday, with little fanfare and nobody really noticing, Pakistan released Hafiz Saeed, the mastermind of the November 2008 terrorist attacks in Mumbai. The main target of that terrorist attack was the Nariman House which housed the Chabad House.

This past Sunday, November 24, was the yahrzeit of Rabbi Gaby and Rivky Holzberg and six other who were brutally murdered in cold blood. It could not have been a coincidence that the mastermind was released two days before their yahrzeit. Saeed should be neutralized.

Here’s a prediction from Blanche. Remember when you read it: November 28, 2017. Michelle Obama could very well be the next presidential candidate for the Democrat party in 2020.

Unless someone is hiding under a rock, those vying for the run are, shall we say, less than less. Take Elizabeth Warren, aka Pocahontas. She took an ancestry test and it came back that she was 2% native American, ergo her nickname. But we digress.

Bernie Sanders is now in the lead and you can bet your last dollar that the Democrat party will move heaven and earth not to have him run.  Warren is too nunish, Joe Biden is up there but he’s too associated with Obama. There’s a long string of unknowns which brings in Michelle my belle. Time will tell, but our prediction is that Michelle will be ‘convinced’ to run.

We’ll talk…

Uber and Your Hacked Data

Blanche was on a reconnaissance mission today. Andrew Scheer, leader of the conservative party, spoke at McGill University in a stunning building on McTavish. We were awed by the elegance of said building, a place for students to have lunch in a normal place. The room was packed (standing room only) with both conservative and liberal students/supporters and Scheer handled the long question period with great aplomb.

The piece-de-resistance were the selfies at the end. Believe it or not, Scheer makes Trudeau look like an aging  oldster. At thirty-eight years old Scheer should be more of the selfie generation. Wait. He’s actually mature and doesn’t have the need to see his face on everyone else’s phone. Instead he actually can answer an entire question without one uh – and without a note. Keep tabs on him. He could very well be your next prime minister.

We used to be big fans of Uber…until our two bad experiences. Both times (today was one) the drivers were unable to speak English (or French) and both times they did not know their way around the city (Ottawa and Montreal).

Turns out Uber has a much bigger problem than illiterate drivers – which they have now downloaded to us. They were badly hacked to the tune of personal data of over 57 million customers and drivers which, get this, they concealed for more than a year.

This week the chief security officer and one of his deputies were fired for their roles in keeping the hack under wraps, which included a $100,000 payment to the attackers. The company paid hackers to delete the data and keep the breach quiet. The don’t ‘think’ your data was ever used. And how would they know a) that the data was deleted and b) that it wasn’t used. They don’t.

The best line we heard about those insane black friday fights is this tweet: If you’re going Black Friday shopping tomorrow, please be a decent human being and turn your phone sideways before recording any fights.

May we suggest you stay home on black friday and do all your ordering online in your pyjamas at your kitchen table. A lot safer, n’est-ce-pas?

Today was the huge Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade. Over 3.5 million people lined the route. Security was t.i.g.h.t. Very tight, especially after that terror attack on the West Side Highway bike path that left eight people murdered.

New York Police Department officers with assault weapons and portable radiation detectors were circulating among the crowds, sharpshooters were on rooftops and sand-filled city sanitation trucks were poised as imposing barriers to traffic at every cross street. Officers also were escorting each of the giant balloons. All brought to you by muslims who follow their religion to the letter of the law. Remember that the next time you take off your shoes, belt, sweater, remove your computer and give over your cell phone when clearing security at the airport.

Oh yes. Remember that also when our darling Prime Minister let it be known that Canada’s doors are open to anyone. He’s an idiot.

Remember when our former mayor Coderre said he didn’t know how many tickets were sold for the e-formula race? He was outright lying. He knew all along or, if he didn’t actually know the numbers, it was because he didn’t ask. Said numbers were always available. Like ten minutes after the race.

Coderre deserves the loss he and his ‘team’ got. Don’t you wonder what name the party will chose now that he’s history? We would give them one suggestion: Make sure, before you announce the name, to put the first letters of each word together. You don’t want to wind up like the caq party. Blanche, that’s really dizguzting.

Good Shabbos,
We’ll talk…

Call Prime Minister Trudeau for your Free Ride

As we don’t live in Alabama or Washington, we are not privy to insider information, so all we can do is speculate on what is really going on with this seemingly endless story. We will present the facts and allow you, the reader to try determine who is lying and who is telling the truth:

…Judge Roy Moore is running for a senate seat in Alabama and has been accused by about nine women of being indecent toward when they were underage or in their late teens. He has denied their accusations. It was also stated that he was banned from a mall at that time because he had a ‘reputation’ for doing these things.

…We have heard that the Democrats are behind this campaign, specifically the Clinton machine, to discredit Moore and get a democrat into that senate seat.

…Why would all these women decide to reveal all the facts now, a mere three weeks before the election? Why didn’t they come out with their stories months ago? Perhaps they saw that Moore was going to win the seat and couldn’t bear him getting all those accolades.

…As well, they are in a lose lose situation. Money they won’t see. They all live in small towns, they are certainly not famous (until now), and they stand to embarrass their children and families.

…Today, an attorney for Roy Moore told reporters that the media, Democrats and establishment Republicans are waging a “three-front war” against the Alabama Senate candidate. He was backed up by two other heavy hitters who also spoke in favour of Moore, outright saying the women were lying. In their press conference, they stated that they spoke to the mall manager at the time and he refuted the charges that Moore was banned from the mall.

What does Blanche think? We believe the women.

59,000 Haitians living in the US will lose their status in July of 2019, at which time they will face deportation if they have not already left voluntarily.

What does our liberal selfie-taking Prime Minister Trudeau have to say on the situation?That they are making some contingency plans in case the news prompts another wave of illegal border crossings into Canada. Can we talk?

How about saying  you can’t come into Canada by crossing the border through a field? How about saying that they have to fill out forms and go through the system like everyone else who came here? How about saying they will be turned back on the spot? How about saying Canada won’t give them a free ride.

Because ladies and gentlemen, those who voted him in are now going to literally pay the piper and force everyone else to do the same thing. Here’s a little tidbit: Get Trudeau outta there as fast as possible. Good looks, good hair, a nice smile and a famous father are not criteria to be Prime Minister.

Montreal’s new mayor announced her executive committee and immediately received flak for who was not named. While the men-women ratio was fine, there was no ‘diversity’. Meaning, only white faces. Can we talk?

What’s she supposed to do if neighbourhoods cannot find people to run in their riding? Pick people out of thin air? She worked with what she had, as she said. The tree-huggers can’t only hug trees. Once in a while they have to actually step back from the trunk and do something.

Here’s another headline: The only way to effect change is from within. Ya gotta be there to vote. So now all those bleeding heart liberals have four years to find ‘diverse’ people to run in the next election.

We’ll talk…

Entitled Men, Courageous Women

We forecasted this last week. Men who thought themselves highly entitled because of the power they wielded are now falling like flies. The first few brave women who came forward and told their stories, gave courage to others to do the same. No matter how powerful you are, touching someone against their will is dead wrong, especially if that someone is underage.

This is the tip of the iceberg as we’ve only been dealing with Hollywood and politics. There are lawyers, accountants, doctors and, perish the thought, religious leaders of every stripe and colour who, we have no doubt, will be implicated in this web.

Right now, there are two men who stand out as shocking. One is Roy Moore from Alabama, running for the senate seat vacated by Attorney General Jeff Sessions.

There are now seven women who have come forward with detailed stories, most of whom were underage when he couldn’t control himself. Not only has he denied all of their allegations, he is still running for election and has tons of supporters. When questioned about Moore’s behaviour, his lawyer said, “Well, in Alabama things are different”.

The other one outed today was Senator Al Franken. Let’s just say he’s seriously disgusting in more ways than groping and taking a picture of a sleeping woman, putting his hands where they had no business being. He’s really dumb, thinking this picture would disappear. His apology left us speechless. He said he was sorry but didn’t remember what happened. Which of course leads us to believe that there are many other women who will shortly be coming forward.

What’s the answer to all of these men?  They will now have to face their wives, daughters, granddaughters and public humiliation at best.

Perhaps those in positions of power today will think twice about acting like they are entitled. Maybe they should think ten times because from the looks of things, women are not going to be intimidated by dirty, old farts or dirty young farts. Feh.

Montreal’s new mayor, Valerie Planet was sworn in today. She looked great and sounded even better. Upbeat with a huge smile, she called herself the happy warrior. The best line of her speech… Montreal doesn’t belong to me. What a breath of fresh air. One wonders what, if anything, she can do about the traffic and all the orange cones. She said she is as affected as everyone else. What? No chauffeur yet?

Coderre, our previous mayor not only thought Montreal belonged to him, he also thought all of our money belonged to him. Time will tell how well Plante does. One thing is for sure, she has a steep learning curve as she’s really a political neophyte.

Blanche, we gotta lose weigh or stop flying. Just when you thought your coach seat couldn’t get more uncomfortable think again. It’s getting smaller and the airlines are adding more seats to an already cramped plane.

United Airlines is the first to be the biggest pig in the race for airlines to make your trip as awful as possible. They will add 21 additional seats on some planes, which means there would be ten seats across.

So why do you think they are doing this? Bingo. It’s based on increasing revenue per flight, especially on long-haul routes. On long haul routes? We already sit like a pretzel with our knees in our chin.

Wait until the dude in front of you pushes his seat back. You could use the back of his seat for a front head rest. When is the government going to step in and stop this?

Ever hear of people working the room? Well, Andrew Scheer, leader of the Conservative party, is working the country.

While Trudeau was in the far east taking selfies in fast food restaurants, Scheer was plugging away all across Canada, finding out what Canadians think and more importantly, what they want.

Of late, we have been hearing that people feel Scheer is not ‘out there’ enough. Or not tweeting enough. Or, perish the thought, not taking selfies. We will allay your fears with some inside information. Blanche does have some good contacts:)

Scheer is laying the groundwork for the next election. He’s slowly but surely making his way across the country, meeting people (without the need of a selfie). It’s called grassroots politics. That’s how our new mayor, Valerie Planet got elected. Dogged, hard work, going door to door, meeting with small business owners, talking to people to find out what makes them tick and what they want to see from their government. We would venture a guess that taking selfies is not on the list.

Scheer is methodical, confident and has surrounded himself with the right people. Wait. He also has a brain and can say more than three words with uttering uh.

Anyone see the three genius basketball players from UCLA apologizing for shoplifting while in China? They were accused of stealing sunglasses from a Louis Vuitton store near their hotel in Hangzhou, China. They were very lucky that Trump was in town, spoke to Chinese President Jinping, and poof! they were released.

During their press conference, which we tuned into by accident, they sounded like they have basketballs between their ears and nothing else. Despite what they did, they will most likely be signed by professional teams raking in millions of dollars. Better they should get all this money than the brain surgeon. Not.

We were driving near Dawson College yesterday and stopped at the stripped yellow crosswalk in front of the entrance. There’s no light or stop sign. Crossing the street in front of our car was a young man who never once picked up his head to see if we were stopping. He was too busy texting.

Can we talk? As a pedestrian, if you don’t make eye-contact with the driver of the car coming directly at you, then assume he or she didn’t see you. They could also be texting or on the phone or just plain distracted and as the walker you would be one big splat on the road. Or, if you lived in Alabama, you would be road kill.

When you cross the street, look up and see what’s going on around you. Rant over.

Good Shabbos
We’ll talk…

Will Squirrel Brains For Supper Help Roy Moore?

In case you were wondering if people in the United States are losing their minds, wonder no more. They are. 

Ever hear of GQ ? It’s a men’s magazine which women also read. Every year they pick  a Citizen of the Year. This year their choice was Colin Kaepernick. He’s the dude who started that whole insanity where players won’t stand when the national anthem is played before football games. Not that he’s playing anymore. No team will pick him up.

Aside from that stunt, he wears socks depicting police officers as pigs and Fidel Castro t-shirts as a fashion statement. Here’s what should happen to Kaepernick.

He should pack up and move to Cuba where there is no infrastructure, the police really are pigs, cause it’s a socialist society and people have nothing of their own. After about five years of living like that, he will come running back to the United States and will be standing like a soldier for the national anthem. GQ magazine should be ashamed of themselves for honouring someone who, instead of helping his ‘people’, is pushing them further back, a la Obama. Go save a whale on your way to Cuba.

Roy Moore, running for a senate seat in Alabama needs to disappear for a while. Wait. He’s not doing anything of the sort. He’s digging his heels in, saying the ‘women’ are lying.

We are referring to the five women (so far) who have come forward with allegations that he was, shall we delicately say, inappropriate when they were in their teens and he was in his thirties. Feh.  Most are now in their fifties.

It also seems at that same time, Moore was banned from a mall where he lives, because he was hitting on teenage girls.

Whether the allegations of these women is true or not, we wonder the following: Why did they wait forty years to come forward, a mere two weeks before the election to choose a new senator? That’s the part here that doesn’t add up. It also lessens the effect of  their word against his.

While we are not doubting something happened all those years ago, why they are coming forward now. Either way, if he wins he loses and if he loses he loses. He was not liked at all before these allegations and now he’s basically a dead man walking.

As an old southerner, he’s not going without a fight, which no doubt will happen, unless he quits in the next few days. Maybe send him some squirrel brains for supper and he’ll ‘see the light’.

In another item where one wonders if people are losing their minds, we bring you mixed locker rooms in some municipalities, with others banning nudity in the locker rooms.

Can we talk? Who walks around naked in a locker room? Of course we know it’s done, but frankly, people need to get a grip, grab a towel and cover up. Who wants to see someone else’s ‘business’ jiggling around? 99.9% of those who frequent locker rooms are, shall we discreetly say, pudgy. Fat would be the right word, but we don’t want to say that. Oh wait, we said it. Move on, nothing to see here.

As for mixed locker rooms men belong with men, women with women. Is there any modesty left at all in the world?

The Montreal Canadiens head office must think Montealers have the brains of a tree nut.

Carey Price, the main goalie, has missed the last five games with what the team originally called a “minor” lower-body injury. It seems that now he’s out for a while. Who knows what kind of injury he has. Thinking about this, perhaps the Trump handlers should get in touch with les Habs cause the latter is certainly able to keep a secret.

Washington insiders just don’t get it. Trump is not a politician and he doesn’t play by the rules. Everyone has their shorts in an uproar because Trump tweeted that the Justice Department should investigate his opponent from last year’s campaign. In case you have been living on Mars, that would be Hillary Clinton.

So why is everyone farklempt? Since Watergate, the unwritten rule was it that sitting presidents do not use law enforcement agencies against political rivals.

That was well and good before the Clinton Clan. If Mrs. Clinton was the one doing Russia’s bidding in the form of a uranium deal and approved it when she was secretary of state, she’s in trouble.

Jeff Sessions, the attorney general was grilled by congress today and said that the Justice Department could soon appoint a special prosecutor to investigate Hillary Clinton. We can’t wait.

And speaking of trouble, Donna Brazile, who wrote a book telling all about Hillary best watch her back – in a very real way. Opponents of the Clintons have a tendency to permanently disappear.

Security at Saks Fifth Avenue in Midtown discovered a loaded gun inside the bag of a shoplifter who tried to buy a $5,600 bag and $2,800 wallet from Louis Vuitton with a store credit card belonging to somebody else.

Can we talk? For all its sophistication, you don’t need to have a pin number for your credit card in most US stores. They are very far behind the eight-ball on this one. Ergo, you can rip off someone’s credit card and, unless you’re one cookie short of a box like this thief was, you can buy quite a bit of stuff before you are stopped.

We’ll talk…

Out of Touch Politicians Are Heading for Extinction

Zut alors, it seems that Montreal had a bigger deficit than Valerie Plante anticipated. We hope she was not surprised by this.

We, the little people, only knew what Coderre spent when he deemed fit to tell us. What nobody except those on the inside knew was how much money he really spent. Let’s put it this way: If he considered our money his money and his money his money, then he spent a lot of money. Plante is not even planted (pardon the pun) in the mayor’s chair yet and she’s already behind the eight ball.

There’s no doubt you have never heard of Roy Moore. He’s the Republican party’s nominee for Senate in Alabama. That is, he was the nominee until a few hours ago.

The fact that he has been accused of assaulting a minor many years ago is only part of his problems. Get this one Blanche: When he was the Alabama chief justice, he was  called the “Ayatollah of Alabama”. Nice, eh?

Lest you think this moniker a bit extreme, think again. He was removed twice from Alabama’s Supreme Court.

The first time when he refused to move a boulder-sized Ten Commandments monument from the statehouse; the second time in 2016 when he was permanently suspended after he instructed probate judges to deny marriage licenses to gay people.

Gets better. He was also called racially insensitive when he used ‘dated’ terms to seemingly describe Asian people and Native Americans during a recent campaign speech.

“Now we have blacks and whites fighting, reds and yellows fighting…” Oy.

It appears that he will have to step down from what was going to be a landslide victory over his opponent. Aw shucks.

If you thought Couillard is out of touch with us plebs, he just took his ‘out-of-touchness’ to another level.

Blanche, can you believe that they are dumping another $250 million to fix the roof on the aging, decrepit, useless Big O? Wait, this gets better.

While they are fixing the roof, Quebec wants the possibility of taking it down to meet the needs of groups that want to hold events under the sun or stars. What??? Here’s a headline: There are 2 out of the 12 months when this is possible and even that’s a stretch.

Here’s exactly why politicians are getting kicked out of office all over the world. They are totally out of touch with their population. We don’t want our tax dollars to fix that roof. Can we take a vote? Maybe have a referendum? No because Couillard is in the ‘we-know-what’s-good-for-you club.

You heard this here first: Couillard is going to lose the next election unless the CAQ makes a big U-turn comes out and says they are holding a referendum after getting elected. If they (the CAQ) sit tight and just do nothing, Couillard will do all the work for them and all they have to do is wait until election day.

Are we the only ones who wondered if Valerie Plante was married? We did a bit of digging and here’s what we came up with:

Plante is a native of Rouyn-Noranda. She met economist Pierre-Antoine Harvey, her husband, at the University of Montreal. She has a degree in anthropology and a master’s degree in museum studies. The couple have two children. Now you know all about our new mayor.

In case you were wondering how bad Hillary’s campaign was run, we’ll give you a peek into the inner workings. Or rather, we’ll give you a peek into a book written by Former interim chair for the DNC Donna Brazile’s encounters with her handlers:

“…the Clinton team were sexist…”They were dismissive. Condescending and dismissive.” She went on to say, “”I felt like it was a cult,” she said. “You could not penetrate them.”

The Clinton team depended on algorithms and dismissed old-fashioned campaigning, going door to door to meet the little people. Going to see the ‘folks’ in Wisconsin was out of the question. Hey, Hillary’s royalty. Even Bill said the campaign managers were totally off the game.

We don’t want to hear from Trump detractors that he is nasty, crude or whatever language you want to use. He’s far from perfect and he’s also the President of the United States of America. Hillary lost and she’s running around shilling for her book, ducking reporters so as not to have to deal with the ‘cases’ she surrounded herself with.

We watch a news show every morning starting at 6:00 am. It’s a bit crazy to get up so early but for the most part the commentary is worth it.

Today, Joe Scarborough said the following: If the shooter in Texas had been Mohammed, the US would be going insane right now. He’s right.

He then noted President Donald Trump’s response to the terrorist attack in New York City last week, in which  an immigrant from Uzbekistan, allegedly killed eight people when he drove a truck onto a bike path.

After that attack, Trump decried terrorism, renewed discussion about the death penalty, called for radical vetting of immigrants and attacked political opponents and America’s judiciary. After Texas? Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

We don’t have the answer to this one except to say again that the twin problem of mental health and guns better be addressed very soon.

Good Shabbos
We’ll talk…