Morris in the Rocking Chair – Back and Forth, Back and Forth

First some news from Israel: Ashkelon mayor Itamar Shimoni raised the ire of leftists on Wednesday after he ordered to temporarily stop the employment of Arab construction workers who are tasked with building protected spaces in educational institutions in the city. The mayor explained that the increased presence of Arab workers in close proximity to educational institutions is potentially harmful to residents’ security, and therefore their employment will stop until the tense security situation improves.

Ya like that the leftists weren’t happy? Time for the leftists to rent a moving van so they can get to the right faster.

This next piece will no doubt make your blood boil, but it’s better to know exactly what we are dealing with. In an unprecedented gesture of hostility towards Israel, the Jordanian Parliament on Wednesday opened a cabinet meeting with a moment of silence for the two Palestinian terrorists who slaughtered five Israelis in a Jerusalem synagogue a day earlier. Wonder what the leftists have to say about this? So much for global warming. Buffalo is literally drowning in snow, if one can drown in snow. In a normal winter they get about 84 inches of snow. In the past week they already have 72 inches with more coming. Wait, it gets worse. It’s warming up next week, quickly. Where exactly is all this snow going to melt? We don’t even want to think about it.

If anyone ever tried getting a green card to work in the United States, or even a work permit, you know the bureaucratic misery you went through. Well ladies and gents ya shoulda taken a rowboat from Cuba or walked across the Texan border in the middle of night. Tonight Obama is going to grant work permits to millions of immigrants living illegally in the United States and to protect them from deportation.

Yup. If you came in illegally, broke the law and lived off the system for five years you’re getting the mother of all prizes from the prize of a president. He’s one special dude eh?

Wait, his intelligence gets better. Most of those he is speaking to tonight are Hispanics. Well, tonight are the Latin Grammy Awards which are very widely watched. Seems they are breaking away from the festivities to listen to what potus has to say.  Guess they’ll have double happiness tonight. (potus=president of the united states).

We won’t write more than one or two lines about this. Are men so egotistical that they think they can do anything they want to women and get away with it because of their position in life? We are referring, this week, to Bill Cosby. Jian Ghomeshi opened a can of worms way bigger than anyone ever thought. We are pretty sure there will be other shoes dropping in the next while. Those men make us nauseous.

All you texting addicts take note. Seriously. A study released this week found that looking down at your cell phone is equivalent to placing a 60-pound weight on your neck. Ouch.

The antidote? Neck bridges. Some kind of oddball exercise that helps your neck. Best you start googling this exercise on your computer which is on your table and find out what to do. Otherwise millions of people will be walking around with the permanently hunched necks of a severe introvert.

In the incredibly shrinking man department, Jetblue airlines said Wednesday it will reduce leg room and add bag fees for fliers who buy tickets on base fares. Yes Blanche, you read that correctly. If you find an airfare at a low price  and can actually save some money, you’re going to get punished for booking it.

The airline will reduce average legroom from 34.7 inches to 33.1 inches—still allowing it to add 15 seats to its standard A320 aircraft beginning in 2016. Guess who’s not flying Jetblue?

Can someone please tell the government in Ottawa to make up their mind about the Champlain bridge. Either rename  the new bridge – and find that name yourselves – or leave it as is,  but stop going back and forth like Morris in a rocking chair. Make up your mind and move on.

Good Shabbos,

We’ll talk

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