I Can See Russia From My Window!

Security will be increased at various federal government buildings in Washington and other major American cities, the Homeland Security Department announced.  No rocket science there.

Whether last week’s murders and shooting inside our Parliament buildings was done by someone deranged, radicalized or both is only part of this issue. We’re lucky he didn’t have a semi-automatic gun which shoots 100 rounds in what, 10 seconds? Jeh Johnson (yup, that’s his name) said that the type of security would not be made public. Really? He doesn’t want isis to know what they’re doing? Blanche could be the homeland security secretary to say that. While we are not prudish, we cannot come to ourselves regarding the, shall we say, overly animated intimate antics of one Jian Ghomeshi. In case you don’t live in Canada and are not one of the three people listening to the CBC, Ghomeshi was their top announcer. He had a show called Q which was syndicated in the US.

His bedroom gymnastics (to put it gently) have gotten him into a pile of trouble. The details are sordid and it’s pretty well impossible to figure out who’s telling the truth. Two things are certain: He’s done at the CBC and he’s suing them for $50 million. He will surface somewhere because he’s very good at what he does, but it will take a while for the sheets to fold. Hehehehehehe. Russian roulette anyone? Yes Blanche, seems that every time you decide to cross the Champlain bridge here in Montreal you are in fact playing russian roulette. Don’t panic on the titanic. Uh, maybe not the best analogy. Don’t worry, the bridge isn’t collapsing, but it is in desperate need of a planned implosion.

There was an oddly frank report in today’s paper about the abysmal condition of the bridge with the accompanying picture  worth a thousand words. From the sounds of what was written, that bridge is not long for this world.

Beams held together with something called carbon fibre which is compared to duct tape, 24 hour monitoring of the stress each beam. If there’s too much stress an alarm is sent to engineers on their cell phone – day or night; 150 workers daily maintaining some stability. Let’s just hope the cost of the next bridge doesn’t include graft, envelopes and ‘interesting’ contracts to ‘interesting’ people who don’t have a CLUE what they are doing.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Rob and Doug Ford show is over. John Tory is Toronto’s new mayor. The only thing we know about him is that he has lotsa money because his grandfather was one of the founders of the Sun Life Insurance company.  Ya won’t be seeing any lurid videos of this dude. Rather – James, please prepare the martinis with two olives and a hint of vermouth.

Here’s something to keep your eyes out for – no joke. People dressed as clowns are attacking random passersby. Just like that and for no reason. It started in Paris and has moved to the United States. Trick or treat.

If anyone thinks Chris Christie has a thread of hope in the run for President, his big New Jersey mouth may just ruin his chances. This guy is a train wreck waiting to happen. A nurse returning from Sierre Leone working for doctors without borders was quarantined in a plastic tent for 3 days  and treated rather poorly, to put it mildly. She was forced to wear paper scrubs in an unheated tent. Christie’s response: “She had access to the internet and we brought her takeout food.” Wait, it gets better. When she said she was going to sue him he said,”Whatever, get in line,” he said. “I’ve been sued lots of times before. Get in line.” What a loser.

Don’t say Blanche doesn’t provide you with some humor as well as the news. Sarah Palin – remember her? She ran for Vice President of the United States and said, allegedly, that she could almost see Russia from her window. Well, she said she might run again: “The more they pour on, the more I’m going to bug the crap out of them by being out there with the voice, with the message, hopefully running for office again in the future.” Stay tuned. The American election is in 2016 but the fun begins in 2015.

We’ll talk…

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