Never Sing in the Shower. Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping, slipping leads to par

We are not exactly soccer aficionados. In fact, we don’t know anything about the game. Given that we do read the papers and know that Montreal’s soccer team went searching for a star player and found one by the name of Didier Drogba. Seems he’s a soccer super-hero.

So he came here, played one game – after getting into shape for 2 weeks and then, poof, hurt his toe and now he’s out. Even with the little we know about soccer, we figured out that to play the game one has to kick the ball. Ergo a booboo on a toe is a big deal. But really. After one game he’s already injured? And then he’ll need therapy to get back into shape? And then the season’s over. He’s laughing all the way to the bank.

In case you haven’t noticed, things on the world stock market are not very good, to put it mildly. How bad is it? So bad that the New York Stock Exchange on Tuesday invoked Rule 48, a measure designed to smooth the opening of the market amid potentially volatile conditions. The rule allows the exchange’s designated market-makers to refrain from disseminating price indications ahead of the opening bell, making it easier and faster to open stocks on days when trading could be volatile. Ya gotta have a strong stomach these days or close your eyes and wait for better times.

This piece is a bit risky to put out there, but it is so bizarre that we could not resist. Pope Francis announced today that for one year only, the “Jubilee Year of Mercy,” coming to a soul in you beginning December 8, priests may forgive contrite women who have had an abortion. But only for one year.

You may be wondering what’s going on here. We’ll enlighten you. Abortion is one of only a handful of sins—including heresy and physically attacking the pope, punching him right in his little pope face—that will get you excommunicated from the Catholic church. What about murder, will that get you excommunicated you may be wondering. No, it won’t. Honestly, the world is upside down.

It seems that the he/she Jenner opened up a huge can of worms. 150 students at Hillsboro Missouri High School walked out of school Monday to protest against a trans classmate using the girls’ locker room during gym class. Lila Perry has identified as female since age 13 and came out as transgender in the last school year. In English that means Lila now wants to go into the girls locker room but he/she is really a boy.

Parents and girls in the school are not taking this lightly or sitting down. Here’s what they said: Girls need girl locker rooms. Boys need boy locker rooms. Those who don’t know what they are need their own locker room. Case closed.

In case you care or most likely don’t, Los Angeles is going to try to get the 2024 summer olympic games. A decision will be made in Sept. 2017. Can we make a suggestion? Find some brown envelopes and fill them to the brim with crisp, clean US $100 bills. They will be guaranteed to win their bid.

We are giving our two cents about the Mordechai Richler Gazebo-gate affair. If his name was Pierre LaToilette and he wrote landmark novels and was an icon in Montreal he would have the park and road alongside the gazebo named after him. Mordechai Richler was Jewish.

It’s pretty obvious, unless you are deaf, dumb and blind, that’s the reason that Richler’s gazebo is rotting and no one gives a rats. Even our ‘dear’ mayor, who came on like the nicest guy seems to be ‘one of them’. We give him 48 hours to straighten this out or we he winds up lumped in with many other racist french canadians in this city. Maybe someone wants to pass this on to him. Unless of course he’s too busy to read it.

We’ll talk…

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