The Blanche Report: The Cheat Sheet, Paranoid & The Award




Princess pauline is working even though it’s her holiday. Give it a rest woman. She and her little missives created a ‘guide sheet’ and it  sent out to their members. It offers talking points on defending its own secularism charter, aka Bill 60 in case they should be questioned whilst eating their holiday dinners or sipping on an eggnog. One would think they could answer questions without a cheat sheet.

Nu Blanche – da ya think when someone at their table wearing a hijab says pass the turkey, some idiot will make them take off the hijab before passing the drumstick? We don’t think so.

We thought it appropriate to translate pass the turkey in a few languages so the PQ will not feel like they are strangers in their own homes – which they now seem to think they are. Ready? In French passer la dinde. In Swhahili –  kupita Uturuki. Now if someone at their table should happen to be, say from Turkey it’s türkiye geçmek. Do you think anyone cares? Only small-minded, backward hillbillies.

In the ‘people are paranoid’ department, here’s a good one. There was someone in a Macy’s store being followed for shoplifting. To get away, he or she threw over a rack of clothing. There was a huge noise that followed and the gzillions of people shopping thought a gun had gone off. You can guess the rest. People ran for all the exits – many carrying the clothing they were about to purchase. When the dust settled and the mall reopened after its 15 minute closing, many people had free gifts from Macy’s, unbeknownst of course to Macy’s. Only in America. Edward Snowden is not about to disappear. Actually, he’s about to appear. Tonight he will deliver the Alternative Holiday Address on a television station in Great Britain. This address is the channel’s answer to the Queens’ message to the country. Here is a small snippet of his address: “Great Britain’s George Orwell warned us of the danger of this kind of information. The types of collection in the book – microphones and video cameras, TVs that watch us are nothing compared to what we have available today. We have sensors in our pockets that track us everywhere we go. Think about what this means for the privacy of the average person.”

While we understand what he was trying to do and the NSA definitely overstepped their boundaries, nonetheless, there is no doubt that he put the ‘good guys’ in a precarious situation. Those who want to harm the Western world are watching all of this unfold, perhaps with some glee. Until there is some kind of balance found here, it would appear ‘they’ have the upper hand. If you see something, say something.

Remember we told you about the 40 million or so credit and debit cards that were hacked from Target over a 2 week period? Well, seems that things are a tad worse than originally thought. It appears that those who planned this  also managed to steal encrypted personal identification numbers. What does that mean? Thieves would be able to crack the encryption code and make fraudulent withdrawals from consumer bank accounts.

Those who perpetrated this had 2 weeks to shop till they dropped or, in this case to sell those credit cards numbers in a flash. We read that they were selling thousands at a time for millions of dollars. All of this had to go down with lightening speed as when people realized what was going on, they would indeed cancel their cards. Blanche, go git the credit card outta da drawer over dere and call da company. Tell em we’re mad as heck and cancelin da card.

Rob Ford, the illustrious mayor of Toronto was voted Canada’s newsmaker of the year by the Canadian Press. While we certainly understand that he himself was a flowing fountain of sound bites, we have one question. In Rob Ford’s little mind don’t you think he feels like he just won the academy award? That being newsmaker of the year is playing right into his hand? Just wait until he runs for mayor again. What you are yelling into your computer – he’s going to run again?? You betcha he is. And guess what? He may just win. This award is certainly going to be a big boost to that big ego of his. The world’s biggest phone giant has signed a deal with the world’s most populated country. Well, almost the biggest phone giant and almost the most populated country. Apple has announced a deal that ensures iPhones will be available in China on the the world’s largest mobile network. It means the phone will be available to more than 760 million subscribers to China Mobile. Some analysts predict up to 20 million iPhones could be sold in the first year of the deal.

If you noticed the discrepancy between 760 million and 20 million it’s because there is one. Most people in China are dirt poor and cannot afford any phone – let alone an iPhone. Nonetheless, both Apple and China Mobile will be raking in the bucks – don’t you worry.

We’ll talk…

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